The Stories You Don't Hear...

On March 8, 6-day old Ceianna Buchanan died while co-sleeping with her mother on a couch. The mother told police she was drunk the night before.

On April 5, 3-month old Kymarius Hunt died while co-sleeping on a couch with his grandmother. She had drunk 8 beers during the day.

On April 19, 2-month old Tyler Winston died while co-sharing with his mother.

On April 25, 6-week old Demetrius Kimble died while co-sleeping with both parents in one bed. His mother had been drinking before bedtime.

On May 17, 2-month old Meekel McCleave died while sharing a bed with his mother early Sunday morning.

These stories make it seem like if you drink you shouldn't bed share, which no one will argue but I want to show you babies that have died when drinking wasn't a factor not were drugs of any kind.


Dayton Lee West Mullen:

His mother Lisa was told my Dayton's pediatrician that bed sharing promotes breast feeding. Lisa had a mattress on the floor when she co-slept with Dayton, she slept with him in her arms, she did not drink, smoke, or do any drugs illegal or over the counter. She slept with only a pillow for herself and a sheet that did not cover Dayton and then one morning she awoke to find her shoulder pressed into Dayton's face. He died from bed sharing.

Alayna Vivian:

Alayna lived for only 5 hours. Her mother Jodie was in the hospital and could not get Alayna to latch on and so after many failed attempts finally asked a nurse. The nurse placed a pillow in the bed with Jodie and then placed newborn alayna on top of it, and she latched on right away. Jodie of course was tired as any mother who just gave birth is and fell asleep while her daughter was nursing. She woke up to the nurses picking up Alayna's limp body, she died from suffocation when her mother fell asleep while bed sharing and nursing.

Chaston Manuel Clark:

Chaston's mommy Victoria also bed shared with her son and will his daddy but Victoria was right next to Chaston when one more she woke up to find her baby not breathing, the autopsy says SIDS but she believe he died from bed sharing. Suffocation and SIDS often look alike with no signs.


Kennedy Marie:



Her mother Tiffany never bed shared with her daughter, she did know the risks but one night she was tired and Kennedy's daddy feed her and burped her. Kennedy was a hard burper so he laid her on the bed for a few minutes before he burped her. He feel asleep and rolled on top of Kennedy killing her by an accident.

Jaleel:

Jaleel and his mommy Stacey bed shared after she had her c-section and tubal as it was easier for her to meet his needs while in pain and one morning Jaleel suffocated on a pillow while bed sharing.

"Mac"

Mac's mommy Sarah bed shared also and woke up the next morning to find Mac lying next to her but life no longer flowing inside his body.

Neveah:

Neveah and her mommy were bed sharing when she died at six months old.

Jaxin:

Jaxin and his daddy were bed sharing when he rolled on top of him and he died at almost 5 months old.

Naylen:

naylen was bed sharing in between her mommy and daddy when she passed away to SIDS.

Heather was bed sharing with her daughter Corynn, I want you to read her story:

"On April 3rd our second

child was born, a beautiful healthy baby girl who we called Corynn. We loved
her very much and she was very welcome in our lives.  We planned on raising our daughter the same way we were raising our son in the attachment parenting style. No cribs with bars that resembled jail cells for us, no way! Our little one would know how important and loved she was by being as close to mom as possible at all times especially for on demand night nursing. Of course she would always be put to bed on her back and away from blankets because we wanted her to have the most comforting safe sleep environment she could have.

Things were going great. We were a happy family together, perfect. We even did baby yoga together the day she died. I still remember her smile when I would look at her upside down from downward facing dog. We went to bed that night looking forward to another day together. At 3 am on June 7th, I awoke and something was wrong. I looked at my daughter lying next to me on her back where I had placed her to night nurse and she was pale and blue.  I picked her up and she was limp and heavy. I screamed to wake up my husband and demanded he call 911 while I started CPR.

 The paramedics came and were not able to resuscitate her. The sheriff and social workers came.  Everyone was very kind to us and empathetic to the tragedy that was occurring. More than once since that
day we have been told.”We slept with our child too.” “You didn’t do anything wrong. It is just a freak accident.”  But why us? I searched for the answer. I reviewed the guidelines for safe bed-sharing. I had bed-shared with my son and had never heard of or even considered what I was doing was unsafe. As long as your baby was put to sleep on their back and away from heavy blankets they would be sleeping safe right?  I had followed all the guidelines for “safe” bed-sharing and was not even in a “high-risk” group. I am lean,don’t smoke, no one was drinking or doing drugs, the bed had no blankets or pillows or guardrails, no pillow-top mattress, and she was not placed between me and another person.  I even wrote to the author of the book for these guidelines of safe sleep and have never heard back. People including medical professionals seemed to stand by that bed-sharing is safe,everybody does it, it was a just a terrible one in a million accident or maybe there was something wrong with me or my daughter?

The coroner’s final report suggested overlay as the cause of death. The image of my body as a murder weapon broke my heart. I only wanted to be there for her always, whenever she needed me. To think it was my ignorance that got her killed makes me feel like a failure. How can I have the right to breathe air when I took away hers? It didn’t make sense. It has taken time and the immeasurable kindness and empathy of family and friends to forgive myself and know that I needed to keep breathing to be there for my son.

My son is older now, but he still remembers his baby sister that died. Sometimes he asks me what happened, why his sister died. I explain she was sleeping in our bed and suffocated on accident. He will scold me and say, “You shouldn’t have had her in your bed. She should have had a crib. Why didn’t she have a crib?” I say I know now it was a mistake and we did not know any better at the time. I hope to help other
people know better. I share my story and I hope it is as obvious to them as it is to a 5 year-old, that babies sleep safer alone, on their back, and in a crib."

Before you think about putting your baby in bed with you, please consider all of us who laid our babies in bed and then laid them gently in their caskets to sleep for an eternity!!!!!

Bed Sharing: What Dr.McKenna and Dr.Sears Fail To Tell You......

A mother and baby bed sharing together in bed is picture perfect isn't it? Seeing a picture of a mommy snuggled with her baby is sweet and they look so cozy don't they? What could be more innocent and good for the your baby? You are in bed with your baby sleeping in the crook of your arm and when he or she wakes up you feed them as you both drift off to dreamland. You get the sleep you so desperately need and your baby gets more sleep too right?

Now imagine this. You and your baby are bed sharing just as Dr.McKenna and Dr.Sears tell you to do. You do not smoke, don't do drugs, and haven't consumed alcohol. You are not over weight and are bed sharing because it promotes breast feeding and have been told it helps reduce the risk of SIDS. You would never roll over on your baby you know he/she is there. You follow every safe bed sharing guideline and then one morning you wake up to a silent baby. For some reason your baby didn't cry to wake you up like they do every other time. You look over and your baby is face down under a blanket or pillow, you are found on top of your baby, or your baby is lying silently and you realize in horror your baby is not breathing. You frantically call 9-1-1 and the paramedics rush to save your baby but it is too late...your baby died sometime in the night...right next to you.

Facts about bed sharing:

80% of babies that die from SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) or SUID (Sudden Unexplained Infant Death) are placed in unsafe sleeping environments included but not limited to: bed sharing, baby found on a couch, or another soft sleeping surface, a baby found in crib with bumper pads, blankets, over heated by too many clothes on to keep the baby warm.

When you bed share a baby has a 40 times greater chance of not waking up in the morning

Dr.Sears advises bed sharing because it worked for him and his wife not based on any studies or scientific studies

Dr.McKenna claims bed sharing reduce the risk of SIDS but Dr. James McKenna is an anthropologist who studies mothers and babies sleeping together in a laboratory he does not study bed sharing in a family's natural environment.

Did you know bed sharing INCREASES the risk of SIDS by putting a baby in an unsafe sleeping environment.

We have no way of knowing which babies at birth are vulnerable to SIDS and we can't control any aspect of the critical development period (2-4 months of age), but parents to a great extent, can control the stressful environment factor by following safe sleep guidelines. Research suggests that all three elements (unknown vulnerability, critical development period, and stressful environment) combine to induce a SIDS death. The data from the CDC and Child Death Review Boards across the country unequivocally show that 8 out of 10 babies who die in their sleep are in unsafe sleeping environments.

Although in the media it shows babies dying from bed sharing when parents are drunk or under the influence of drugs, most bed sharing deaths are of parents who did everything right and were not under the influence.

McKenna will tell you bed sharing deaths are attributed to parents who feed their babies formula. Regardless whether you breastfeed or formula feed neither will protect a baby from suffocating.

Last year in Texas, Child Protective Services investigated 177 infant deaths where bed-sharing (also known as co-sleeping) was a factor, although the exact causes of most of those deaths are not known.

Bed sharing was associated with 2 times greater risk of SIDS compared with not bed sharing.

Nakamura et al. (CPSC, 1999) described 515 deaths of children younger than two years who were sleeping in adult beds.  Of these deaths, 121 were reported to be due to overlying of the child by a parent, other adult, or sibling, while 394 were due to entrapment in the bed structure.   A criticism of this study has been that the relative risk for bed sharing is unknown because we have not researched the number of families actually practicing bed sharing.  In an April 2001 presentation given at the National SIDS Alliance annual conference in Chicago, N.J. Sheers of the CPSC, working with Marian Willinger (epidemiologist from NICHD and member of AAP task force on Infant Sleep Position) presented the denominators and calculated rates.  According to their study, the risk of infant death for an infant alone in a crib is 1.32 per 100,000, while the risk of death for an infant in an adult bed is 30.0 per 100,000, a 23-fold increase.   We firmly believe that one infant death due to a completely preventable cause is one too many.  A greater than 20 fold increase in the risk for death is simply too great to ignore.

Rethink Your Position

Now would you chance bringing your baby into bed with you knowing the facts now?

                         Creating a Safe Sleep Environment for your Baby:

Every infant deserves to have the safest environment possible and that includes when babies sleep. Where the newest and probably the cutest member of your family sleeps is one of the most important decisions parents can make.

There are so many different options of where your baby sleeps some parents bed share (where an infant sleeps in bed with you and/or with your partner) Although many people still practice bed sharing, and pro bed sharers claim that it promotes breastfeeding and bonding with your baby there is a much safer way. Is it called crib sleeping, and is when your baby is placed in a crib. With crib sleeping you do not have to worry about accidental suffocation, layover, entrapment, and both you and baby will get a more sound sleep knowing you are both sleeping safely.

I will share with you the guidelines for creating a safe sleep environment for infants that is recommend by the AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics), the NICHD (National Institute of Child Health and Human Development), and the CPSC(Consumer Product Safety Commission), along with First Candle, and The American SIDS Institute.


•Always place your baby to sleep on his/her back at nap time and bedtime. Do promote tummy time while your baby is awake & under supervision.

•Use a pacifier to help reduce the risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) use after a month if breastfeeding so the infant does not have nipple confusion.

•Do not use blankets, not even light weight receiving blankets! Instead use a Halo Sleep Sack. Blankets can suffocate a baby if the blanket it is near their face which can happen when babies move while sleeping. A Halo Sleep Sack prevents this from happening but keeps the baby warm just like a blanket would.

•Do not overly dress your baby in the winter months. Over heating has been linked to SIDS. Dress the baby as you would dress yourself.

•Never share a bed, couch, or any other sleeping surface with your baby. When bed sharing accidents can and do happen. The baby could accidentally suffocate, become entrapped between the bed and wall, or a parent, child, even an animal could roll on top of the baby causing the baby to stop breathing. More than 64 babies die a year to bed sharing deaths.

•Do room share. Place your infant’s bassinet, portable crib, or crib in the same room as you. You can still hear your baby, wake up when it’s hungry, and still keep the baby safe. Studies have shown that room sharing is recommended for the first six months of life to help reduce the risk of SIDS.

•A new study has found that having a fan while your baby is sleeping can also help reduce the risk of SIDS by recirculating the air that your baby breathes.

•Do not smoke during or after pregnancy. Even if you do not smoke inside the smoke still lingers on your clothes and even in your hair. Please get help to quit smoking to keep you healthy and to give your baby a better start at life.

•When you put your baby to sleep in his/her own crib make sure there are no stuff animals, toys of any kind, bumper pads, or blankets. The safest way for crib sleep contains baby & a fitted sheet. Nothing else should be in the crib that could cause a suffocation risk.

•Never bed share but especially if you smoke, drink alcohol, take prescribed or non prescription drugs, are overly tired, or over weight.

•Also educate others on safe sleep practices…. Especially anyone caring for your infant!

If you follow these simple guidelines it could save your baby’s life. All babies should have the chance to grow up.

Resources:

http://www.firstcandle.org/

http://www.sids.org/

http://www.cpsc.gov/

http://www.nichd.nih.gov/

http://www.aap.org/

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Parents-Against-Co-Sleeping/107296279313586

http://www.halosleepsack.com/